Bringing Hobbies Home

Those Damn Old Hobbies

I’m not the most interesting person. Scratch that, I have hobbies, had hobbies, i’m salvaging my old hobbies rebuilding myself, my brain and nervous system. The other version of me, say pre-diagnosis FND, Fibromyalgia and M.E. I had a very active life and it was filled with creativity. Photography, travelling solo, flying drones, writing, producing content and well everything else. I overdid it, and continued to over-work on my green days.

That glimmer of hope I have now and again where I feel less pain than the night before I try to continue with hobbies. I won’t be running 5K-9K like I used to, in fact I can run about 7 minutes in total without falling apart. I do MMA/Traditional Ju-Jitsu, boxing and walking and all these come with a compromise in energy and reduced activity the next few days. I work for myself therefore I have built a schedule around my energy.

However, what I have also tried to do is once I have been in survival mode for so long and my feet touch the ground, I am able to walk in a straight line and my body is behaving and my brain isn’t battling with my nervous system. I can enjoy things again.

Adjusting my Hobbies

I used to love photography, I would travel solo around the world, I would hike across nature and photograph the beauty of this world. When I was bed-ridden my cameras caught dust and I had to move them from my room because I just couldn’t look at them. It was a constant reminder of what I had lost and I wasn’t able to mourn immediately.

I did start to use my camera when I began to leave the house again with a friend and forced myself to take pictures. I went from photographing glaciers, icebergs, sunrises and sunsets to a random duck at the local park. I felt nothing, and I was clearly in a dark place. When I began to recover and rebuild I started to implement my hobbies in my home, predominantly in my room. There were a lot of book purchases, so if I was bed-bound again or relapsed then I could pick up a book. I began using my camera again. I would capture the moon and stars, from early hours in the morning before the morning prayer to sunsets. I missed stargazing so much, but decided to capture the stars from my garden. It wasn’t exactly Machu Picchu, but it was still a moment to photograph. An opportunity to dust off the camera and hone those skills I had once developed.

So even though I have had a lot stripped from me, I have slowly begun to implement my hobbies back in my life. No it’s not the same, but I know my life won’t be.

Written by: Shehla Ali